10/09/2026
A longer, deeper post than normal, but sometimes it helps awareness to have a little real life behind it. ❤️
It’s a hard one to write..
Many of you know I’ve always battled with mental health issues. In fact Bumblee’s was a result of it. Seeking solace in my garden & allotments, then preserving the gluts.
It’s always a battle & sometimes that battle can become too much for some 😢
Many years ago, I lost someone very dear to su***de. It broke mine & many others hearts.
As a teenager, I never understood what level of despair he must have reached. Well… years later, I reached that level myself.
I wasn’t alone or unloved. I had an amazing, supportive husband, a home, a job & so many things I should have been grateful for.
So why would I even think of ending it?
It wasn’t really about wanting to die per se; I wanted the all-consuming despair, being a burden, worry, years of self-loathing/hatred & feeling like I wasn’t worth the air I consumed to STOP.
The only thing that interrupted those thoughts, was recalling the ache of losing someone I loved to su***de. I couldn’t bear the thought of leaving that pain with my amazing husband.
Eventually, I reached out for help. I’m incredibly grateful that I did.
Sadly, not everyone has that interruption & is in such a dark place they genuinely cannot see another way out.
If you ever get close to thinking you aren’t worth the air you consume, or you just want the pain/worry to stop. Please know you’re worth listening too, entitled to be here & truly deserve the chance to be happy my lovely.
Please reach out for help. Tell someone. A friend, partner, GP, a helpline, anyone. I’m happy to listen or offer a hug - I’m a hugger after all. ❤️
And, if you suspect someone’s struggling with life, let them know you’re there. Maybe make a coffee & listen, if they’ll talk. If not, just be there.
Sometimes it can be enough just to interrupt those thoughts to help someone get through the next few minutes & strong enough to move forwards.
For the love of Mother Nature, please be kind to your fellow human beings & to yourselves too.
With so very much love,
Francine x ❤️
Samaritans — call 116 123
***depreventionday