03/31/2025
🚨 Attention Buc-ee’s Shoppers! 🚨
Y’all, we love you. We really do. But these Hoovarounds are TEARING UP our floors like a pack of beavers in a lumber yard. Our concrete ain’t built for Nascar-style donut spins in the BBQ sandwich aisle.
If you need help getting around, we highly recommend:
✅ A good ol’ fashioned wheelchair (classic, timeless, zero tire burnouts)
✅ Droppin’ a few brisket tacos and taking a lap around the store (cardio, baby!)
✅ Training for the 2026 Buc-ee’s Olympics—100-meter dash from the Beaver Nuggets to the bathroom
We’re not saying we don’t love our plus-sized patrons—we just love our floors more. Help us help you. Stay safe, stay mobile, and please, for the love of beaver nuggets, stop drifting in the snack aisle.
Much love,
Your Favorite Gas Station and Lifestyle Brand 🦫❤️